- Location
- Oslo
A genie and an idiot
Three guys stranded on a desert island find a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them each one wish.
The first guy wishes he was off the island and back home. The second guy wishes the same.
The third guy says: ‘I’m lonely. I wish my friends were back here.’
Ooo Heaven is a place on earth
Sid and Irv are business partners. They make a deal that whichever one dies first will contact the living one from the afterlife. So Irv dies. Sid doesn’t hear from him for about a year, figures there is no afterlife. Then one day he gets a call. It’s Irv. ‘So there is an afterlife! What’s it like?’ Sid asks. ‘Well, I sleep very late. I get up, have a big breakfast. Then I have sex, lots of sex. Then I go back to sleep, but I get up for lunch, have a big lunch. Have some more sex, take a nap. Huge dinner. More sex. Go to sleep and wake up the next day.’ ‘Oh, my God,’ says Sid. ‘So that’s what heaven is like?’ ‘Oh no,’ says Irv. ‘I’m not in heaven. I’m a bear in Yellowstone Park.’
Snail with an attitude
A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch.
He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. Three years later there’s a knock on the door.
He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: ‘What the hell was that all about?’
Three guys stranded on a desert island find a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them each one wish.
The first guy wishes he was off the island and back home. The second guy wishes the same.
The third guy says: ‘I’m lonely. I wish my friends were back here.’
Ooo Heaven is a place on earth
Sid and Irv are business partners. They make a deal that whichever one dies first will contact the living one from the afterlife. So Irv dies. Sid doesn’t hear from him for about a year, figures there is no afterlife. Then one day he gets a call. It’s Irv. ‘So there is an afterlife! What’s it like?’ Sid asks. ‘Well, I sleep very late. I get up, have a big breakfast. Then I have sex, lots of sex. Then I go back to sleep, but I get up for lunch, have a big lunch. Have some more sex, take a nap. Huge dinner. More sex. Go to sleep and wake up the next day.’ ‘Oh, my God,’ says Sid. ‘So that’s what heaven is like?’ ‘Oh no,’ says Irv. ‘I’m not in heaven. I’m a bear in Yellowstone Park.’
Snail with an attitude
A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch.
He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. Three years later there’s a knock on the door.
He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: ‘What the hell was that all about?’